Wednesday, January 23, 2013

My life report card. Aced it.

I saw this writing prompt once that I always thought was funny/interesting. In the prompt, you were to list all of the imaginary subjects you'd get an A in, like an imaginary report card. Which is funny because I'm pretty sure I never got an A in anything in school (I didn't care about school AT ALL). So here's all the things I'd ace...

1. Drinking copious amounts of coffee. A++
2. Checking Instagram. A+++++
3. Peeling Cuties for Wyatt. A+
4. Watching Spongebob without ACTUALLY watching Spongebob. A+
5. Picking my nails. A+++
6. Bitching to my sister about anything. A+
7. Cleaning up pee drops off the bathroom floor. A+++
8. Asking for Wyatt to smile at the camera, but not getting him to smile. A++
9. Crocheting stupid cowls. A++
10. Staying up way too late getting stuff done I should have done during the day. A+++++
11. Talking to my husband about whatever random thing I just thought of. A++
12. Feeling sad/jealous over Pinterest. A+++
13. Giving up on my hair being down and immediately top knotting it. A+
14. Turning to Twitter for all those burning life questions. A++
15. Plucking my eyebrows. A+
16. Fantasizing about Chipotle. A++
17. Adjusting my mother effin' couch cushions. :\ A++
18. Telling Wyatt to please put some clothes on. A+
19. Doing laundry but not folding or putting it away. A++
20. Peeing with an audience. A++++
21. Pissing people off. A+++++++++++

As you can see, I'm the valedictorian at LIFE University.

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