Saturday, May 11, 2013

I'm sorry my gigantic head ruined your vagina - HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY WEEKEND!


I hope you're all having a pretty good Mother's Day weekend! We all know what we really want is the following...

1. Uninterrupted sleep, waking up naturally.
2. The ability to sit on the couch for longer than 5 minutes at a time.
3. To not hear a single whine/cry/moan/tantrum/anything that sounds remotely annoying.
4. To actually have control of the TV!
5. For my kid to WANT whatever food is given to him, preferably NOT by me since it's Mother's Day.
6. Go to Target... alone...
7. To use the bathroom alone. That means NO ONE knocking on the door asking what I'm doing or better yet, not having to hold anyone on my lap while I'm using the bathroom.
8. No cleaning of poop or pee on anything or anyone. Actually, I don't want to see any poop at all.
9. Personal space bubble to be respected.
10. To not feel guilty for wanting all of these things.

Ah Mother's Day! We're awesome guys!

For WORST Mother's Day gift ideas, check out this post.

(feel free to add to the list in the comments!)

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